October 11, 2011


I am currently at a place in my life where I am truly experiencing what it feels like to be a Gemini. I am being pulled in two drastically different directions and it is creating quite the unbalance. I have a beautiful little boy, a home, a happy marriage, and I'm working, which so many people can't say. Yet I find myself not satisfied with where I thought I would be right now. I thought I would have a home, as in a house. I thought I would be teaching-full time, not randomly. I feel like I want to just go shopping like I use to and buy amazing pieces of clothing. We are on such a tight budget right now that I get excited if we have the money to buy toothpaste. Every conversation with my husband revolves around money and I never thought we would ever do that, because we were just so different when we first got married.

I hate complaining and I will probably regret venting this to any readers I have because it sounds so selfish, materialistic and unappreciative.
I've been praying and thanking God for all that I have and at the same time feeling unsettled in my heart with our situation.

Do you ever find it hard to not worry and just believe everything will be okay?

I know that I should not have anxiety, but I'm human and flawed and I feel it. Here's to a new day tomorrow and hopefully a brighter outlook.

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